


There's A What In There?

by katling



Series: Chauncey The Bear [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Black Emporium, F/M, Pre-Relationship, dorian is amused, evelyn is ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 13:00:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3897265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katling/pseuds/katling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I will warn you straight up that this contains spoilers for a couple of things that can be found in the Black Emporium.</p><p>Evelyn goes to the Black Emporium and returns to Skyhold with a burning desire for one thing Xenon has in there. Cassandra is not amused. Dorian is <i>very</i> amused. Varric is both amused and disturbed. Cullen is confused.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's A What In There?

**Author's Note:**

> This is set early in Skyhold so Cullen and Evelyn have been doing some flirting but they haven't kissed yet. This also features my 2H warrior Evelyn Trevelyan who is completely ridiculous and can also be found in a couple of the stories in my [Inquisition Allsorts](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3523040) collection if you would like some background on her. I would have included this one in there but I was so amused about it, I decided to indulge myself and let it stand alone.

It was purely by chance that Cullen was in the lower courtyard when the Inquisitor returned from her expedition to Kirkwall and the Black Emporium. The invitation had been something of a surprise, albeit an interesting one. Cullen had heard of the Emporium when he had been serving in Kirkwall and he’d also heard the rumour that the Champion had received an invitation. He’d never been in a position to either confirm the rumour or see the Emporium himself. Templars, former or otherwise, clearly weren’t of any interest to Xenon the Antiquarian.

Evelyn was clearly still excited from the trip and when he walked over, she beamed at him. It was all he could do at that point not to trip over his own feet to have that smile levelled at him and he firmly ignored Varric and Dorian’s smirks and the momentary gleam of amusement in Cassandra’s eyes at his reaction.

“Cullen!” Evelyn pulled some papers out of her armour and waved them at him. “The Emporium is amazing! We picked up some schematics I think you’ll like and there’s more we can get if we can find the money.” She grimaced. “Xenon sets his prices pretty high.”

Cullen took the schematics she was waving at him and gave them a good look. His eyebrows went up. These were good quality armour and weapons schematics, better than anything they currently had.

“It looks like these are well worth the expense,” he said.

“I know,” Evelyn said with a grin. “And you wouldn’t believe the things he’s got in there beyond the schematics.”

Cassandra gave a world-weary sigh and Varric and Dorian snickered and Cullen immediately began to wonder what they had found in there.

“I’ve heard it’s quite spectacular.”

Evelyn practically bounced when he said that and her face lit up and she grabbed at his arm. “Cullen!” she said excitedly. Before she could say anything more, Cassandra rolled her eyes and made a disgusted noise.

“ _No_ , Inquisitor,” the Seeker said firmly before scowling at Varric and Dorian as their snickers turned into laughter.

Evelyn deflated a little and actually began to pout. “But, _Cassandra_ …”

“ _No_ ,” Cassandra repeated firmly.

“But he’s _adorable_ , Cassandra, and I’m sure Cullen wouldn’t mind. Would you, Cullen?” 

Evelyn turned her gaze onto Cullen and smiled winsomely at him. His brain immediately short-circuited.

“Uh… no?” Cassandra’s steely exasperated glare broke through his daze and he blinked and straightened a little. Varric and Dorian were leaning against each other and laughing uproariously but he steadfastly ignored them. “I mean… uh… what are we talking about?”

“There’s a teeny little _bear_ in the Emporium!” Evelyn squealed, jumping up and down and clapping her hands in excitement. Her face was alive with delight and Cullen could only stare and think how beautiful she looked. “His name is _Chauncey_ ,” Evelyn continued, looking at Cullen imploringly. “And he’s _adorable_. I’m _sure_ I could talk Xenon into selling him to me. We can get him, can’t we, Cullen? He’s really very small and he wouldn’t be any trouble.”

Cullen opened his mouth but in the face of Evelyn’s importuning and plaintive looks – which he found he had little in the way of defences against – and Cassandra’s glare and Varric and Dorian’s laughter, he honestly couldn’t find a thing to say. Finally he managed to pull himself together long enough to get _something_ out.

“A… a bear?”

“Just a _little_ one,” Evelyn said, all but batting her eyelids at him. It was doing absolutely nothing for Cullen’s ability to think. 

Dorian finally managed to get his laughter under control and he wandered over and threw an arm around Evelyn’s shoulders.

“Evie dear, do go easy on our poor Commander. He looks absolutely pole-axed.”

Cullen managed to gather his wits and he glared at the Tevinter mage. “I am not…” He wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence. He looked over at Cassandra. “A bear?”

Cassandra sighed and rolled her eyes. “The Antiquarian has a small bear running around the shop. An experiment by a Tevinter mage apparently.” Her voice turned _very_ dry. “The Inquisitor was very taken by the creature. Do _not_ encourage her.”

“Oh, Cassandra, you’re such a spoilsport,” Evelyn said with a pout, though she seemed more amused than insulted by Cassandra’s words.

Cullen still felt baffled by the conversation but at least he was on slightly firmer ground than before. “I… don’t think we’re really set up to care for a bear, even a small one.”

Evelyn looked crestfallen and Cullen had to firmly squash the desire to change his mind. He didn’t know anything about this bear and he _really_ shouldn’t get into the habit of giving in to Evelyn just because she gave him a particular kind of look.

“But he’s so _adorable_ ,” Evelyn said plaintively.

Cullen felt his resolve waver then Varric stepped forward to rescue him.

“On a slightly creepier note, Curly, did you ever hear about what became of… Meredith?”

Cullen blinked at the abrupt change of subject and then sobered and swallowed. “She… the… statue was still in the courtyard of the Gallows when I left,” he said uncomfortably. “No one could agree on how to… to move it. Her.” He frowned. “Why?”

“I could have sworn I saw it in the Emporium, that’s all,” Varric said, looking as disturbed as Cullen now felt.

“I… I’ll make some enquiries,” Cullen said, alarm adding to the dread Varric’s words had engendered. “If he has… the statue…”

“Yeah,” Varric said dryly. “Not good and we should probably… do something. Buy it. Whatever.”

Evelyn looked outraged. “Wait, we’re going to buy the creepy statue of the former Knight-Commander but not the teeny adorable bear?” She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “You people need to get your priorities straight.”

That sent Dorian off into gales of laughter and Cullen sighed. “Inquisitor, the statue of Meredith is made of red lyrium which, yes, I do think is more important than a… a small bear.”

“Humph,” Evelyn said, looking discontented. “Fine, get all technical on me.” She rolled her eyes. “Alright, buy the creepy statue. I’m going to get changed.”

She gave them all a grouchy glare and stomped off towards the main building, a laughing Dorian in her wake. Varric shrugged and smiled and followed, leaving Cassandra to stand next to a slightly discomforted Cullen.

“Do not let her wind you around her finger, Commander,” Cassandra said sternly, though there was a distinct gleam of amusement in her eyes.

“What?” Cullen yelped. “I… I’m _not_! A…and anyway, there is nothing going on between us.”

Cassandra made a harrumphing noise. “Of course not.” She took a few steps towards the main building then turned and levelled a finger at Cullen. “And do not even _think_ about buying that wretched bear for her.”

Cassandra whirled around and stalked up the stairs to the upper courtyard, leaving Cullen standing where he was, rubbing the back of his neck and trying to convince himself rather guiltily that he _hadn’t_ been planning on… enquiring about the bear.


End file.
